The Cave of Wonders.

I still remember my first day in the house of hot. . I begged and begged Chelsey to let me live with her even if it was just in her storage basement room.  I didn't really care what condition it was in at the time I just needed a roof and a closet. Chelsey reluctantly agreed and warned me multiple times that it was pretty scary. 

The gravity of the situation didn't really hit me though until I walked through the basement door that day and realized this was home. It was dark and musky, spider webs hung from the wooden frame boards that ran across the ceiling.  A moldy, musty, rotting carpet covered the floor of my room, the lights and electrical didn't really work, (I was flashlight status for a couple days.) I don't think anyone had ever  attemepted to live down there it was more of just a storage space under her house until then. It literally felt like the depths of despair, but in my effort to stay positive I named it "the cave of wonders." I spent every day that week down there vacuuming up the spider and cob webs, repainting, ripping up carpet, scraping up the sticky stuff under neath it with a one inch metal spatula thing, scrubbing and bleaching the floor, painting flower patterns on my walls,  I redid my whole bedroom from top to bottom. I guess I kind of redid myself in the process. 

That was almost three years ago. This sounds so crazy but I found myself in that basement I found myself in that house. I found myself with ALL the girls that lived there. We were a family there. So many laughs, so many tears, so many hugs, so much wine ;), so many talks, so many dreams, so many parties, so much dancing, so many inside jokes, so many mistakes, so many lessons, so much love. <3

...I moved out again today. Such a bittersweet day. I suppose it had to happen sometime. I'm just thankful to have had the experience and the memories I do.  The HOH days have been the best times everrr of my life so far, but I guess it's time for a change. Time for a new adventure. <3

I can't hear you over myself.

The world is full of people telling me I can't, I shouldn't, I won't, that's not going to work, that is wrong, how I should be, what I should be, where I should be, how I should do things, that i'm not enough, that i'm weird, that I'm crazy, that I'm this, that I'm that, that I dream to big, that it's impossible....... and no matter how loud the world screams even if it's the whole world.... I'm NOT listening. 

Like a light.

You will never be as beautiful as you are when you are doing what you love and what you believe in, You will never look as fantastic as when you are following your passions. There is a light that no make up, no fancy clothes, no awesome hairstyle, and no ritzy accessory can replicate. When you are doing something or talking about something you love, something you believe in, you cannot help but glow.

Tilly's marketing/relationship theory.

EDC Las Vegas 2012 

EDC mainstage 

I read an article about marketing the other day. It said too many people spend time trying to get people to like a product instead of spending time making their product something people would like. I went to EDC last weekend and it was amazing. I found it interesting they had almost tripled the amount of tickets they sold last year. However anyone who went can easily see how they did this. They put millions of dollars into making the event amazing. From the costumes, to the artists, to the stage set up, to the rides, to the v.i.p area. I myself saw one video trailer for the actual event AFTER my ticket had already been bought. I didn't see anyone looking for or asking people to come to EDC, no one wrote me on facebook and invited me to that party. From my point of view they took all the extra money that would have gone into promoting and put it into the event and creating an experience that people would walk away and talk about for months, thus doing all the promoting for them. I expect next year will be even bigger and better.

That being said I think this form of marketing also applies to people and relationships. I see so many people looking for love. Going to insane lengths trying to get someone's attention or someone's interest. If these people would take all of that time and energy and put it into themselves---> their career, their hobbies, or their personal growth, they would probably already be with the type of person they wanted to be with.  exp.  Shaun White can probably have his pick of any girl he wants. If he hadn't spent time practicing snowboarding and instead spent it looking for love, trying to hook up with girls, or trying to be cool who would Shaun White be? Nobody. It's because he followed his dream and got really good at what he loves to do. While the rest of his crew was probably out hitting on chicks at the bar he was boarding down a mountain and becoming an amazing athlete. Now girls come to him. Stop thinking about trying to date someone and start thinking of what you can do to better yourself. Get really good at a sport, hobby, or perfect a talent.  Go to the gym and get a sexy body. Learn how to do your hair/ makeup/clothes to make yourself look better.  Read books and learn new things so you can carry a conversation well.  Focus on your work and having a good career. Think of what you look for in a person and become that yourself.

I think it would be better to do all of this just because you love yourself, but it will help you to attract people as well. This is just my thoughts on it. I'm not saying I'm wrong or right, but I have seen and heard alot about relationships from all of my clients and friends and this is what I've come up with..... it's worth a shot. No matter what if you end up being a better person it's all worth it.

Things I would tell my younger high school self.

Highschool is only four years long. NOBODY is going to care how popular you were after you graduate.

 Don't worry about being cool, not being invited to parties, or having to stay home on a saturday night. There is so many amazing things coming up.

 Enjoy the time with our family, because you will miss them.

Be nicer to mom, she just cares and she actually knows what she's talking about. You're lucky to have her....LISTEN!!!

Don't cut your hair off!! Don't ever try and cut your own bangs- not cute.

Be nice to the guys that are nice to you, not the guys that look nice.

Spend time with your girlfriends. The best memories you have will be running around with the girls.

Don't get involved with a guy and think it's going to last forever. Don't let a guy control any part of your life, and don't let anyone talk you into anything you don't want to do.

Just because "everyone is doing it" doesn't mean it's a good thing to do. You don't have to be a leader, but you also don't have to be a follower.. just be you. :)

Be nice to people... You never know how what you say can effect someone for the rest of their life. You don't know what others have to go home to... be compassionate.

Don't cheat on anyone if you do date- it's far worse to hurt people and you will lose more then you ever gained.

Just because you aren't a math wiz doesn't mean your aren't smart and talented. Let's just say you're better at other things. :))

Don't be so eager to grow up.. enjoy right now. You have the rest of your life to pay bills, drink, date, and  
be a grown up. So for now just have fun being young and only worrying about your next math test.

Big things are coming. :)) Life doesn't go how you expect... but it is going better then you could have ever imagined.

Duh. Why didn't I think of that.

I had a little four year old girl sit in my chair today. As I was 

cutting her hair she asked how my hair cutting cape had gotten

 a hole in it.. I said "someone must have cut it." She looked up

and said " do you think it was a leprechaun?" This made me 

smile.. I wish I still thought that way :)) (I told her it definitely 

was probably a leprechaun...leprechauns are ninja) ♥

A life lesson from a bike lesson.

When my mom was teaching my little brother to ride a bike he kept falling over and couldn't seem to get the hang of it. After many scrapes and bruises he jumped off the bike and ran in the house, when he came out he was shoving something in his pocket. He hopped back on the bike and road it perfectly, my mom was a little shocked and later asked him what it was that he put in his pocket.. he pulled out a crumpled piece of paper with a picture he had drawn of himself riding a bike. He said "I knew I could ride it because I saw myself ride it already." - visualization is everything. You'll never be able to do what you want if you can't even picture it ♥ ( I now draw pictures of myself living all my dreams ... so it's going to happen!